Uncover Weston-Super-Mare's Hidden Gem: The Old Colonial Inn!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the swirling, salty, sometimes-a-bit-dodgy (let's be honest, it's Weston-Super-Mare!) world of The Old Colonial Inn. And trust me, after my recent stay, I've got more to say than a seagull with a stolen chip. This isn't your sterile, perfectly-manicured hotel review; this is the raw, unfiltered truth, sprinkled with a healthy dose of "did I really just experience that?"
First things first: Accessibility. This is important, folks. The Old Colonial Inn does have facilities for disabled guests, and an elevator. (Thank heavens for the elevator, because after a day of pounding the promenade, I was not walking up stairs.) They've got a decent setup, but I'm not a wheelchair user, so I can't give you the definitive lowdown. Best call them directly if you need specifics. But generally speaking, they try.
Cleanliness and Safety (and the Covid Craziness): Right, let's get this out of the way. In these post-pandemic times, everyone's obsessed with germs. The Old Colonial Inn is trying. They've got the hand sanitiser, the staff in masks, and the signs. They claim to use anti-viral cleaning products and do daily disinfection in common areas. I'm not going to lie, I saw a lot of cleaning happening. And the room sanitization opt-out available? That's a nice touch, for those who are extra paranoid. I was happy. They have hand sanitizer everywhere. All the usual suspects, but they have rooms sanitized between stays which really is the most important thing.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: A Culinary Adventure (or Disaster):
Okay, this is where things get interesting. Let's start with the good. They have a bar. A proper, well-stocked bar. And the happy hour? Oh, the happy hour. Let's just say I sampled a few local brews. They also have restaurants. They have a breakfast buffet which is pretty decent. There's a coffee shop as well. I did try the Asian breakfast, which was a bold move, and it was… well, it was an experience. Let's leave it at that. They do have vegetarian restaurant and international cuisine in restaurant. The poolside bar is a nice touch, although the pool itself… well, we'll get to that. The 24-hour room service is a godsend after a long day of exploring.
The bad? I'm not going to lie, the salad in restaurant could have been better, more variety. I think they could improve the buffet in restaurant and the Western cuisine in restaurant.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (and the Pool with a View):
Right, let's be honest. Weston-Super-Mare is not exactly the Maldives. But The Old Colonial Inn does offer some ways to chill out. They've got a swimming pool! (Outdoor, FYI.) Now, the pool with a view? Well, the view is of… other buildings. But hey, it's a pool! And after a day of dodging seagulls and battling the wind on the pier, a swim is a swim. They also have a spa/sauna, spa, steamroom. I didn't try the Body scrub or Body wrap. There's a Gym/fitness available.
Services and Conveniences: The Practical Stuff (and a Few Quirks):
This is where The Old Colonial Inn shines. They've got all the basics: Air conditioning in public area, concierge, daily housekeeping, doorman, dry cleaning, elevator, facilities for disabled guests, ironing service, laundry service, luggage storage, and safe deposit boxes. They have car park [free of charge] which is a major plus! They do contactless check-in/out, which is a win in this age of germophobia. They have a gift/souvenir shop. They even have car power charging station.
Here's where it gets interesting. They have business facilities and meetings, so it's good for business. They have Cash withdrawal. They have Babysitting service, which is great. They have Family/child friendly. They have Kids meal. They have Proposal spot, so if you want to propose to your loved one, here is the place.
The Rooms: My Personal Fortress of Solitude (and Slightly Smelly Carpeting):
My room? Ah, my room. It had air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes, bathroom phone, bathtub, blackout curtains, carpeting, closet, coffee/tea maker, complimentary tea, daily housekeeping, desk, free bottled water, hair dryer, in-room safe box, internet access – wireless, ironing facilities, laptop workspace, linens, mini bar, mirror, non-smoking, private bathroom, reading light, refrigerator, satellite/cable channels, seating area, separate shower/bathtub, shower, slippers, smoke detector, socket near the bed, sofa, soundproofing, telephone, toiletries, towels, umbrella, wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], window that opens. It was clean, and the soundproofing was pretty good (essential, given the proximity to the main road). The extra long bed was a welcome treat. But, and this is a big but, the carpeting… let's just say it had seen better days. There was a faint, almost imperceptible, "been-through-a-few-parties" aroma. But, hey, it's the Old Colonial Inn, not the Ritz. It had everything and was very comfortable.
Internet:
They have Wi-Fi [free] and Internet access – wireless and Internet access – LAN. So, you can work if you have to.
The Verdict: Should You Stay?
Look, The Old Colonial Inn isn't perfect. It's got its quirks, its occasional imperfections. But it's got charm. It's got a good location. It's got a decent pool, a bar, and comfy beds. It's a solid choice for a Weston-Super-Mare getaway.
So, what's the deal?
My Offer (Because I'm Feeling Generous):
Book your stay at The Old Colonial Inn now, using code "WESTONFUN" and get 15% off your stay, a complimentary bottle of wine upon arrival, and a free upgrade to a room with a view (subject to availability!).
This offer is valid for stays booked before [Date] and for stays between [Date] and [Date]. Don't miss out! Book your slice of Weston-Super-Mare heaven (warts and all!) today! You won't regret it!
Luxury Hanoi Haven: 2BR Vinhomes Skylake Gem!
Right then, buckle up, buttercups! This ain't your polished, pre-packaged holiday itinerary. This is… well, it's my trip to Weston-Super-Mare, and you're all invited along for the ride. Warning: May contain excessive use of exclamation marks, questionable decision-making, and a healthy dose of seaside cynicism.
Trip Title: Weston-Super-Mare: A Proper Seaside Scramble (And Hopefully Some Chips That Don't Make Me Regret My Life Choices)
Accommodation: Marston's Inns Weston Super Mare (Pray for me. Seriously.)
Day 1: Arrival, Anxiety, and the Awkwardness of Being a Tourist
1:00 PM: Arrive at the train station. Oh, the joy of public transport. Already feeling the slight panic of being a fish out of water. The station looks like it hasn’t been updated since my grandma was a sprightly young thing. Found a guy selling knock-off seagull keyrings. Tempted, but I've got a feeling I'll be regretting every purchase later.
1:30 PM: Check into Marston's. Okay, the pub downstairs smells promising. Hope the rooms are less "seaside boarding house" and more "slightly-less-seedy seaside boarding house." Found the room, and it's… functional. Carpet that's seen better decades, a view of a brick wall, and a faint whiff of… damp. Right. This is going to be interesting.
2:30 PM: Reconnaissance mission. Stroll along the promenade. Blimey, the wind! My hair’s already doing the tango with my face. The pier is… pier-y. Lots of flashing lights, screeching children, and the distinct scent of deep-fried everything. Already spotting the arcades. Tempted, but I'm trying to resist the siren call of the claw machines. (Famous last words, I'm sure.)
3:30 PM: The all-important chip evaluation. Found a chippy (of course, it's a bloody seaside, isn't it?) called "Harry's Harbourside Haddock Heaven." The name is a bit much, but the queue is long, so it must be good, right? Ordered a cod and chips. The chips are… well, they're chips. Crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside. Not life-altering, but a solid start. The vinegar, however, is the real winner. That's what I call a proper seaside chip experience.
4:30 PM: Attempting to navigate the arcades. Dear God, the noise. The flashing lights are giving me a headache. Spent a solid ten minutes watching a kid win a giant, fluffy… thing. Probably a llama. (I'm not sure. I wasn't really paying attention, I was too busy trying to figure out which machine was the least likely to steal my money.) I caved and played a game of air hockey. Lost, spectacularly. Swore revenge.
6:00 PM: Dinner at the pub downstairs. The steak and ale pie is calling my name. Fingers crossed it's not the kind of pie that's mostly pastry. Actually, the pie was fantastic. Proper, hearty, gravy-soaked perfection. I’m starting to understand why this place is so popular.
7:30 PM: A contemplative stroll along the beach. The tide's out. The sand is… well, it's sand. Found a couple of old guys fishing. They’re probably seen it all. I envied them. The peace and quiet was nice, though.
8:30 PM: Back to the room. Exhausted. Contemplating an early night, or maybe just a long, hard stare at the brick wall.
Day 2: Sand, Sea, and the Savage Realities of Miniature Golf
9:00 AM: Breakfast at Marston's. The full English is… well, it's there. The sausage tasted a bit like cardboard, but the bacon was alright. Coffee is strong enough to wake the dead.
10:00 AM: Beach time! Armed with a borrowed beach towel, sunscreen, and a healthy dose of skepticism. The beach is surprisingly clean. Spent a good half hour just staring at the sea. It's… vast. And blue. And full of secrets (probably seaweed).
11:30 AM: Miniature golf. Oh, the hubris! I thought I was good at mini-golf. I was wrong. Terribly wrong. Spent the next hour battling a particularly vindictive windmill and a series of ridiculously angled holes. Lost, again. Humiliating. My competitive spirit is bruised. My ego is shattered.
1:00 PM: Lunch at a little café. Fish finger sandwiches. Simple, satisfying, and exactly what I needed after the mini-golf massacre.
2:00 PM: The Grand Pier. Ah, the pier. It’s… a lot. Rides, arcades, more flashing lights. Wandered around, feeling slightly overwhelmed. Did manage to win a… well, I'm not sure what it is. Some sort of fluffy creature. It's hideous. I love it.
4:00 PM: The all-important ice cream evaluation. Found a place called "Scoops Ahoy!" (Ugh, the names!). Ordered a double scoop of something called "Weston Sunset." It was… alright. A bit too sweet, but the cone held up. That's the important thing.
5:00 PM: Wandered along the beach again. Saw a dog chasing a seagull. The seagull won. Nature is beautiful.
6:30 PM: Dinner at a seafood restaurant. The seafood platter was a triumph. Fresh, delicious, and a welcome change from the deep-fried everything.
8:00 PM: Back to the pub for a pint. The locals are friendly. The atmosphere is… comforting. Maybe Weston-Super-Mare isn't so bad after all.
Day 3: The Longing for Home, and a Final Farewell to the Sea
9:00 AM: Breakfast, same as yesterday, but with a slightly more optimistic outlook on the cardboard sausage.
10:00 AM: A final walk along the beach. The tide is coming in. The waves are crashing. I'm feeling… surprisingly sentimental. Weston-Super-Mare, with all its quirks and imperfections, has grown on me.
11:00 AM: A last-minute scramble for souvenirs. Found a keyring for the seagull. And a postcard that says "Wish you were here… (preferably not)." Perfect.
12:00 PM: Check out. Goodbye, damp room! Hello, freedom!
12:30 PM: Train station. The journey back is a blur of tired eyes and reflections.
1:00 PM: The train arrives. I'm going home. And I'm already plotting my return.
Uncover Weston-Super-Mare's Hidden Gem: The Old Colonial Inn - FAQ (and My Ramblings!)
What *is* The Old Colonial Inn, exactly? Seems a bit… old.
Okay, so, the Old Colonial Inn? Picture this: a proper pub, not some fancy gastro-palace pretending to be authentic. It's *old*. Like, probably older than your nan. And yes, the name is a bit… well, let's just say it reflects the times it was built. Don't expect sleek lines and minimalist design. Think creaky floors, dark wood, and a certain… *character*. It's a pub, plain and simple. A good pub. And yes, it *does* feel like stepping back in time. Which, after a week of battling seagulls for chips on the beach, is sometimes exactly what you need. (Don't even get me *started* on those gulls...)
Is it actually "hidden"? I'm not one for secret passwords.
"Hidden" is a bit of a stretch, honestly. It's not like you need to solve a riddle to find it. It's just… tucked away. It's not right on the main drag, which is a *good* thing. It's far enough from the pier and the hordes of screaming kids that you can actually hear yourself think. I'd say it's more "discreetly located" than "hidden." And believe me, after a day of dodging inflatable flamingos on the beach, "discreet" is a godsend. You'll probably stumble upon it whilst lost, or following a local.
What's the atmosphere like? Is it full of grumpy old men glaring at you?
Okay, the atmosphere… *that's* where the magic happens. Yes, there *are* some regulars who've probably been drinking there since before the Queen was born. And yes, they might give you the once-over when you walk in. But honestly? They're usually harmless. Mostly. They're just… *part* of the furniture. It’s a proper pub, with proper pub people. You might hear some friendly banter, the clinking of glasses, the occasional burst of laughter. And, if you're lucky, a sing-along. (Disclaimer: Sing-alongs may involve off-key renditions of sea shanties. Embrace it.) It's cozy. It's friendly. It's… authentic. And yes, I've seen grumpy old men *smile*. It happens.
What about the food? Is it just crisps and peanuts? (Please say no!)
Alright, the food. It's pub grub. Don't go expecting Michelin-star dining. But it's good pub grub. They do a mean Sunday roast, I've heard. (Note to self: Must try the Sunday roast next time). They usually have some decent specials on the board. And yes, they have crisps and peanuts. But they *also* have proper, hearty meals. Think pies, and chips. And sometimes, if you're really lucky, they have a proper ploughman's lunch. Perfect after a long day of, well, whatever you do in Weston-Super-Mare. Eating fish and chips on the beach, probably. Which, let's be honest, is a national sport.
What's the beer like? Because, let's be honest, that's important.
The beer… *ahhhhh*, the beer. This is where the Old Colonial Inn truly shines. They have a good selection of real ales, often local brews. And they're well-kept. Seriously, the beer is good. Really good. I'm not a beer snob, I just appreciate a decent pint. And they pour a decent pint. I can't remember the names of them all, to be honest, but I do remember the *taste*. And the feeling of contentment after a couple. Perfect. Just… perfect. It's the kind of beer that makes you want to stay and chat, even if you don't know anyone. (Which I often do.)
Is it family-friendly? I've got kids, and they're usually a bit… chaotic.
Family-friendly… hmmm. That depends. They're not going to kick you out, but it's not a "kiddie-friendly" place, you know? It's a pub. Pubs are for adults. They're not designed for screaming children running wild. It's more of a place to *escape* the chaos, not add to it. I *have* seen families there, but it's not the primary demographic. If your kids can behave, then maybe. If you're after a play area and a kids' menu, probably not. Consider yourself warned.
Okay, but what's the best thing about the Old Colonial Inn, in *your* opinion?
Okay, this is where I get all gushy. For me? It’s the *atmosphere*. The sheer, unadulterated *pub-ness* of it all. I went there once, after a truly *awful* day. Lost my wallet, got soaked in a downpour, and the seagulls managed to steal my ice cream (again!). I was in a right state. Walked into the Old Colonial, and the warmth just… hit me. Not just the physical warmth from the fireplace, but the *emotional* warmth. The friendly chatter, the clinking glasses, the smell of… well, beer and chips. Someone offered me a seat at the bar, even though it was packed. The barmaid (a lovely woman named Brenda, I think) poured me a pint and just… smiled. No judgment, no probing questions. Just a smile and a good pint. And in that moment, everything felt a little bit better. It's a place where you can just *be*. Where you can shed the day's stresses and just… relax. It's a proper escape. And that, my friends, is worth more than all the gold in Weston-Super-Mare. (And trust me, there's not a lot of gold in Weston-Super-Mare.) It's just a good, honest pub. And that's why I love it. Okay, I'm getting a bit sentimental now, time for another pint…
Is it easy to get to from the train station? I'm not a local.
Yep, it's pretty easy. Walk out of the station, head… well, I'm terrible with directions. Basically, walk towards the sea, then ask someone. OrThe Stay Journey
